One of the hardest parts about the home study process (for us, at least) was the profile book. For those of you new to the adoption world, for many agencies, the process of being “matched” with a birth mother is pretty complex.
First, the adoptive couple fills out a sheet on preferences. Every agency is different, but a lot of the questions are pretty standard. Some of the standard ones are things that you will be willing to accept of the birth mother/adoptive child, and include things like special needs, if the birth mother has used drugs or alcohol during the pregnancy, mental illness in the family, and whether you’re willing to accept premature babies or birth mothers that haven’t had prenatal care during the pregnancy. Some agencies also let you specify gender, but ours does not.
After you fill out the form, that gives the agency an idea for who they can share your profile with. Which brings me to “the book.” The profile book is what birth mothers look at to get a sense of potential parents for their child. Our agency only shows the books of couples to birth mothers who meet the “criteria” that the adoptive couple said they were comfortable with, so depending on the birth mother, she could have a lot of books to look through, or only a few.
So, I guess what I’m trying to say, is that this profile book was a huge source of stress for me! It basically is the sole contact the birth mother has with us as a potential adoptive couple until after we’ve been selected! It has to show the birth mother how we relate to each other as a married couple, our family and friend support system, our beliefs and traditions, and anything else that might set us apart in the birth mother’s eyes. So, no pressure, right?
But, we got there. We put together our book using Mixbook, and were really happy with the quality and the options to personalize the book to our tastes. The printed book looked exactly how we anticipated it looking, based on the “preview” feature on the website. Overall, we were really happy (and, we waited for a sale, so got it at a discount too!). Below you can see a few pages that we put together, just to get an idea!
The book was definitely a labor of love, but we’re both very happy with the finished product. I hope it really gives birth mothers an idea of who we are as individuals, as well as who we are as a married couple. I hope you enjoyed learning a little bit more about us as well!